The Vicarstown Urban Rail System
by PolkaDotSideplates
Summary: A fun series about Vicarstown's Light Rail Vehicles, and really looking into how engines live their lives. Includes engine YouTubers, engine rights activists, and insight on how engines get their make-up on. Feel free to leave a review!
1. Neville, Murdoch, and the VURS

The Vicarstown Urban Rail System is the official name of the LRVs at Vicarstown. The system boasts 3 lines and 20 engines. The engines names are Bizzy, Chizzy, Dizzy, Fizzy, Gizzy, Hizzy, Izzy, Jizzy, Kizzy, Khizzy, Lizzy, Mizzy, Pizzy, Quizzy, Rizzy, Sizzy, Shizzy, Tizzy, Vizzy, Wizzy, Yizzy, Zizzy, Zhizzy, and Todd. Everyone thought Todd was a bit odd, they just couldn't put their couplings on why.

The three lines each meet underground at the railway station. From there, Line "A Ocean"runs to the strait, where it climbs onto Strait Street and then goes south to the Marina. The "B Quizzy" line starts in a charmingly industrial part of the island (think the Season 5 shunting yards) and makes its way downtown. Line "C Brenner" cuts diagonally from the south-west suburbs (known as Birch Valley) to the north-east suburbs (known as the Sunrise district). At any moment, 7 LRVs are running on each line, but traffic isn't always, say, very smart.

Neville backed his train down next to the warehouses in the north-western part of the town. It was charming. When you think of a place like this, you think of towering, smoking buildings and overgrown sidings and the trucks all having graffiti on them. No, here were short factories, well-ballasted rails (courtesy of the Arlesdale Railway), and the only markings on the trucks were the letters "NWR". Put that together with the bright blue sky with several beautiful clouds, and you had as close as a Sudrian engine could get to a calm place. His good friend Murdoch, who always longed for peace and relaxation, would enjoy this place for his metidation. Or was it methodition? Neville couldn't remember.

His train of thought was interrupted by the sound of a train coming. "That's strange," thought Neville, "trains don't come here often." Then, in between two buildings, he saw a strange tram. She looked to be an electric railcar, but with glasses, and there were no points to her tracks in sight.

She spotted him too, and spoke up, "Who are you? We don't see many engines around here anymore."

"I'm Neville, I'm delivering some trucks."

"I'm Quizzy, I'm running my line."

Neville looked at her from wheel to telegraph. She had no buffers, was painted yellow and green, and she was much wider than her standard gauge tracks.

"I didn't know there was a rail line here," said Neville.

"This is Vicarstown's municipal rail system. I'm running my B line. They say I'm in charge because I'm the smartest one."

"That's why I've never seen you, Vicarstown Station is off the ground."

"Is it?" asked Quizzy. Just then, her doors closed, and she trundled off.

Neville was confused. Why didn't Quizzy ever see the station?

Quizzy sped expertly along the line, stopping precisely at every stop. At Stryd St. Station, she found Yizzy.

"There's activity outbound," said Quizzy. "I think that mysterious warehouse is being used."

"The old Sodor Ice. Co building? Why's that mysterious?"

"No, no, the Hatt Railroad Works. The one that stopped being used when that Steamworks at Crovan's Gate."

"The one that Lizzy says is full of zombie workmen, steam engine ghosts and self-aware rails?" shivered Yizzy. She raced away. She wanted to get past the yards so she didn't have to deal with it.

"Wait, I mean there are actual engines there, not ghosts!" But Yizzy was already out of ear shot.

For Quizzy, the main problem with being an LRV was that conversations couldn't last long, compared the NWR who stopped at stations for several minutes. Now Yizzy believed there were ghosts about. Stupid Lizzy.

"Driver," asked Neville on the way to the Blue Mountain Quarry, "why don't the VURS engines know what's in Vicarstown?"

"Well, the LRVs go underground when they reach the downtown area, so as not to disturb traffic."

"Oh," replied Neville.

What, you wanted a longer conversation? Well that's what they really said, so there.

VURS runs 24 hours a day, but each tram gets a two hour long break to cool down and have a maintenance check. The LRVs have a face at each end, so though their minds don't need to sleep, their eyelids do, so they always switch faces. Interestingly enough, this means at least one face is sleeping. Because of this, LRV's have astounding memory because one end is always storing information. Anyway, we're getting really off-topic, so here we go. It was 1 in the morning, and Yizzy had just gotten off her cool-down block. She was making her way up to the B line terminus at Packard and 32nd. She was terrified as she reached the supposed haunted warehouse at Packard and 28th.

Suddenly, she heard a rumbling sound, and a cloud of steam appeared. Then, a large engine steamed out of the cloud!

"The ghost engine!" cried Yizzy. "It's all real!"

The ghost engine puffed another cloud of steam, and some strange figures lurched toward them. Climbing out of the engine, the driver and fireman climbed out of the engine, and the men all walked toward Yizzy.

"Oh no! The zombie workmen want to get driver and the passengers!" Yizzy, very scared indeed, raced away from the platform. But then, a rock-ex-machina in the tracks derailed her!

"The self-aware rails!" shrieked Yizzy. She had absolutely lost it, and now the zombies were catching up The zombies walked in front of her headlights. And she could see that they weren't zombies at all!

"Do you need any assistance?" they asked.

"Yes," said her driver, "no one is hurt, but we'd like a call to the office."

"Of course," said the ghost engine's driver, who handed his phone through the window.

"Then, what was the ghost engine, and the self-aware rails?"

"Ghost engine?!" she heard someone say from afar. "That's what this is all about? All I ask for is for peace and quiet, but you silly little LRVs disturb me because you can't even see a rock on the line!"

The ghost engine's fireman laughed. "That's my engine, Murdoch, not a ghost. And he's right, you did hit a silly old rock. There's absolutely no such things as ghosts!"

The workmen all looked at each other.

Apparently there was a track between the North Western and VURS, and Harvey came to rerail Yizzy, and Lizzy came to serve her route during her off-block, as punishment for spooking Yizzy. Yizzy isn't afraid of ghosts anymore. She thinks it's all silly make-believe.

No one ever told her that the warehouse was being used as a base by Sudrian ghost hunters.


	2. Sidney's Stupid Stumble

Sidney is the world's only engine with short-term memory loss. He works on the Little Western as a dockyard diesel. Well, that's what it says on the documents in his cab. He once got so lost, he got to New Zealand by rail! (don't ask, I don't know either) This time, Sidney was coming back from a brief visit to South Carolina, when he went the wrong way at Wellsworth (it's waaaaaay too easy to write for this guy!). Then he made a u-turn in Brussels, visited Marseille for the third time, and turned right after Vicarstown, in the direction of the manufacturing yards from the last story.

This story takes place the morning after the last story. Thing is, when Harvey left, the VURS switched the track back to where it should be, but the North Western didn't Sidney turned right again, ran over the points since they were set against him, and dim-wittedly landed on the rails.

"Oh I must alert the Fat Controller. Wait, about what? What was I saying? Ah, I have to find my way home!" So Sidney raced away.

Then Sidney saw Daisy. He knew because daisies look nice, and this engine wore make-up. He liked to make up ways to remember things. For example, Oliver is bright pink like an olive.

The LRV he mistook for Daisy was Zhizzy, who screeched to a halt, thinking to herself that maybe this new make-up was making her hallucinate Class 08s casually strolling down her line. Zhizzy never wore black eyeshadow again.

Sidney passed another LRV. He didn't know her, but he still needed to get home. And that was going to be hard to do, since cars and lorries were racing around him and calling him names.

Eventually, Sidney rolled to a tunnel portal, where he saw a red light.

"Red is for 'the line is ready'!" he thought. And raced ahead.

A mother was taking her three-year-old twins to the Marina, when she (and everyone else) heard a voice on the loud speaker.

"Unidentified object moving inbound, please step away from the edge of the platform."

The twin with the red shirt stayed with Mommy. The twin with a burnt sienna shirt with a Stegasaurus on it didn't. In fact, it was like the devil told him to do exactly the opposite of what the man in the loudspeaker said. He went to the edge to try to see what it was, and (you guessed it) fell on the tracks.

A common misconception about LRVs is the third rail. LRVs don't have a third rail. The child was not electrocuted. He couldn't see the object yet, but he did see lots of plastic bottles between the rails.

"Recycling!" said the boy, and proceeded to pick up the bottles and put them on the platform.

"Inserd Nayme Hear! Get back here this instant!" shouted the mother, half-terrified half-steaming mad.

Sidney rounded the bend.

Sidney stopped. He liked children.

Inserd climbed onto his buffer, and onto the platform.

Sidney rolled away. That family never recycled again.

Sidney rolled out of this strange tunnel with stations in it, and onto the A line. Sidney liked it here. There were lots of boats. Now if those cars could get lost...

Sidney saw a stop sign. He stopped. Forever. Madge the lorry came to take him back to Arlesburgh Harbour. What, you thought the ending was gonna be more epic? Like Sidney falling in the sea? Well, actually...

Sidney rolled off the lorry. And the quay. His driver got out, but Sidney was fished out four days later. Since he was completely submerged, they had to do CPR. And if you've never seen CPR done on an engine, look it up on YouTube, it's hilarious.


	3. Ghost Train

**The idea for this story came to me by listening to "Ghost Train" by The Tuggster Intensifies. This chapter is dedicated to him.**

Remember the warehouse from the first story? Yeah, we're there again. The ghost hunters were hot on the tail of a ghost said to have worked on the Harwick and Cronk Railway. They had spent the day at Harwick interviewing people, and now dusk was falling.

Ectoplasm II, or simply Ecto, was the small steam engine that belonged to the ghost chasers. He was being steamed up in an old siding that the ghost chasers knew connected to the H&CR. Ryan backed down onto a freight train next to them.

"Are there really ghosts on Sodor?" shivered Ryan.

"Absolutely, especially engine ones. We're focusing on them this season," replied one of the workmen.

"Are they scary?" asked Ryan, now worried.

"Depends, some like to play tricks, but others help the line, like warn engines of upcoming trouble."

"Well, I hope that I meet some of the second kind," replied Ryan in his usual positive way.

Eventually, Ryan pulled away, just as Ecto and his 2 ghost hunting vans were ready.

"We're looking for a small mixed traffic tonight, and we've recorded his whistle." The leader played a recording of an very sharp whistle. "Ecto will find the ghost and follow it. There are no known records of where the tracks are, so it's very important that we constantly send our position to home base. The ghost should always stay on the rails, even if they're buried. We can just follow until we catch it.

And with that, Ecto made his way into the dark.

It was midnight by the time they heard the whistle.

"Speed up," called the leader, we've got him!"

Ecto charged toward the rails. He had been fitted with a special machine in front of his wheels that dug away the dirt. But even with that, it was hard to stay on, and Ecto had to pound the earth beneath him to stop the vans from moving too much.

And that's when they saw it. A ghostly green spectre of an engine was running away from them. It whistled three times, and disappeared behind a cliff. Ecto raced ahead at a dangerous speed, and soon the spectre was back in their sights. The men out back took pictures and and made calculations.

"We can catch up to it in 7 minutes at this rate!" called one of the men.

Yes, they pay people to make these kinds of useless and awkward calculations.

Ecto charged ahead, and the leader, hanging to the handrail, had a shunter's pole and was trying to attach Ecto to the ghost. The rope swayed and swung, and the ghost's pistons were pumping frantically.

Suddenly, a huge ravine appeared in the ground, and the ghost kept going.

"STOOOOOP!" cried Ecto, and slammed on his brakes. He screeched to a stop, right at the edge of the cliff!

"Call for an engine to chase him down! We're near the Skarloey!"

Rheneas was at Lakeside, waiting to run light engine to Crovan's Gate when they heard the call.

"The Bluebell Branch doesn't stray far from this line, we can follow him," he said as they raced away.

Rheneas soon found the ghost, and followed it quietly. Meanwhile, the ghost hunters had called Ryan and told him to be ready to chase the ghost.

Rheneas blasted steam from his whistle as loud as he could, and the ghost started to speed up again. As it entered the Main Line, Ryan's driver opened the regulator, and the ghost was in danger of being caught again.

The ghost and Ryan wheeshed through Henry's tunnel, but then Connor appeared with the night train! The ghost switched onto his track, but vanished through Connor as he slammed on his brakes. Ryan kept chasing it through Vicarstown. Then, the ghost slid to a stop, and chuffed backwards. Ryan's driver threw him into reverse, and they were now chasing it towards the manufacturing yards.

Sizzy is not well-liked by the other engines. She hasn't done anything bad, she just doesn't show emotions. She doesn't enjoy anything, seldom speaks, and even the passengers particularly dislike riding on her. But sometimes at night you will hear her whispering to strange beings. To many of the engines, she is very frightening. As she whirred along the line, a green spectre appeared at the stop. There was no one around, even her driver wasn't really paying attention.

"Who's chasing you?"

Nothing answered.

"I've never met him, what does he look like?"

Still nothing.

"He sounds very handsome. It's a shame no one seems to like ghosts like you."

The wind rolled through Sizzy's wheels.

"I'm sorry you have to suffer like this. Maybe if you just gave yourself in..."

Sizzy could feel anger coming from the engine.

"But I hear the Fat Controller is very nice, I'm sure he wouldn't-"

The ghost wheeshed.

"Fine, have it your way, but remember, I'm always here for you."

And as Ryan huffed, quite out of breath, past the points, the ghost vanished.


	4. Quizzy saves the day

The VURS opened in 1997, with LRVs that were bought from San Francisco, who was getting new LRVs from Breda. Now you may remember that the B line is "Quizzy's". Like how Thomas "got" his branchline, Quizzy earned it. However, Quizzy's exploit was in San Francisco, and was carried over when the other engines told the manager about her bravery. This is that story.

/Ô\ \- The Pyramid of Time Travel

At 4 in the morning at Balboa Park Station, the LRV's start to leave for work, and Plizzy was always the first one to go to work on the J line. The J line is the most precarious of the routes, as it includes several right-of-ways, and by far the steepest part of the railway at Dolores Park. The incline is 9 degrees, but also has a stop at the bottom, middle, and top. Only the engines and their drivers know that the stops are really only there to pin down the brakes. Plizzy had just passed 30th St. when she felt a drop of rain on her nose, and by the time she got to Hill Hill, it was pouring rain. She started the descent at Chattanooga, and thought everything was fine.

Everything was not fine.

Everyone knows that the only love story worse than Twilight is trains and [wet] leaves. What I'm saying is, Plizzy slipped past Liberty.

"STOP!" Plizzy cried out. Her brakes were on, and people were watching from the bridge as she honked her horn loudly.

Quizzy was on her way up from Embarcadero, when she heard the horn.

"It must be Plizzy!" she said as she veered ahead.

Remember that it was dark out in all of this. Quizzy charged up the hill.

"Put sand on the tracks; put it everywhere!" she shouted to her driver, who did just that. But now Plizzy had slid past 21st St.!

The points changed, and Plizzy went on to the inbound line, facing Quizzy. Quizzy stopped at the middle station, and started to move backwards just before Plizzy hit her. They coupled up, Quizzy held on as she used the sand to screech to a halt. Right before the intersection!

Everyone jumped out to congratulate Quizzy for her quick thinking.

"It wasn't my idea," she admitted, "I just read it in a book about a railway in England. An engine named Duck stopped a line of freight cars on a very large hill by deceasing the pressure of the impact, and got his own branch line."

"Well I think that's what you deserve too," laughed her driver.

And she did. The manager gave her the J-Church line, so she only ran that line, and had a say in matters relating to it. Although she didn't have a complete veto, as some stops, including Middle Station were closed, and eventually, in 1996 the Boeing LRVs were replaced by Breda ones. 22 of the LRV's were sold to Vicarstown, but the rest were sadly scrapped. Eventually, at least, she did meet Duck, who was very proud of her. Everyone lived happily ever after. Except the engines who were scrapped.

R.I.P. The Boeing LRVs 1980-1996


	5. Bizzy and the Grumpy Passenger

Bizzy is an LRV who usually runs on the C Brenner line. She claims she is overworked, even though she works the same amount of time as everyone else.

"I'm put upon!" she said to Nizzy.

"I'm put upon!" she said to Pizzy

"I'm put upon!" she said to Rizzy.

The Mean Girls were confused. "Put upon what, the rails?"

"No, put upon with work, driver says he is too."

"Put upon, what a silly saying," said Nizzy. But Pizzy and Rizzy liked it, and they sang about it too.

-Bizzy's a put upon-

-put upon, put apon-

-Bizzy's a put upon-

-Poor old Bizzy!-

"I am put upon," grumbled Bizzy, "I am, I am, I am!"

You wouldn't think so, but the Sudrian engines are actually big fans of the show (Well, the LRVs are. The engines dislike having their most embarrassing moments on screen for all to see. That's why I'm writing these, so you can read THEIR mishaps).

The next day, Bizzy was whizzing by the Marina at 6:00. She enjoyed this part of the day, it was not too cold, and not too hot, almost no passengers or traffic, and the beautiful colors of the sky, pink light reflecting off the clouds in front of a dark blue sky.

So it's only natural that something has to ruin it.

The Grumpy Passenger had been fired from his job in Tidmouth, so he had moved away from Cros-ny-cuirn to a nice home in the Marina district for his new job downtown. He did this so he wouldn't have to deal with trains.

And everyone knows you can't get away from trains on Sodor.

I should probably tell you that Vicarstown does have a set of double decker bus lines. It's not important through where they go, just know that the Orange route ends at Strait and Percival.

Which is where the Grumpy Passenger lived.

You can guess which mode of transportation he took downtown.

Somehow, the entire week went excellently, and the Grumpy Passenger was now less grumpy. Then there was (as there always is) trouble. Trying to avoid a drunk driver, an owl bus (near empty thankfully) skidded across the road and into a large tree. Because of the clean-up, the line was re-routed. But the Grumpy Passenger read about the accident on Twitter before the re-routing. And thought he had to use the LRV.

Bizzy had done nothing wrong, but the Grumpy Passenger was already in a bad mood. Things turned for the worse however, when sparks flew from Bizzy's pantograph.

Now trust me, the LRVs sending sparks off is normal and happens all the time. But the grumpy passenger took a lesson from leftists and formed an opinion without knowing any facts. He freaked out, and I mean FREAKED OUT! He frantically pulled tried to pull open the doors, while the other ten or so passengers just looked at him strangely. At the next stop, the driver actually got out to assure the GP that everything was OK. The Grumpy Passenger was embarrassed, and was now in a quite foul mood.

So when they came to Churchill and Strait, a large T intersection with a long red light, he complained.

And when Bizzy stopped a little longer to let an old lady cross the street, he complained.

And when Bizzy had to wait for clearance to go underground, he complained.

Remember how this is Bizzy's favorite part of the day.

And how the sun is coming to heat up another summer's day.

And how the Grumpy Passenger is ruining this precious, soft, fresh time.

You can expect that Bizzy flipped.

Strangely, it seems to be common knowledge that an engine rolling back and forth quickly is the engine equivalent of masturbating. It's not. I won't get into it now, but seeing the type of fanfic this is, you can expect me to get into that sooner or later. Anyway moving back and forth is a common method for punishing (no, you sicko!) trucks. For railcars like Daisy or LRVs it's a method of hurting the people inside you. You may think that it's stupid to hurt lots of innocent passengers to bring justice to one man. It is. But Bizzy didn't care.

"Was that an earthquake?" cried one of the passengers.

But the Grumpy Passenger knew, so at the next stop, he made his historic last disembarkation. The next day he moved to Balladwail for an internet service provider. He never saw trains ever again, other than in his nightmares.

On the other hand, Bizzy was happy all day. And you know why? Because she was sent to the shed for deliberately hurting passengers. She got to sleep all day. She didn't complain about work again for a solid day.


End file.
